When hippos battle in the mud....... © Brian Hooper, January 2010 When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who pay the price; They’re only small amphibians, but they don’t need telling twice. They always know what’s coming, when they hear the hippos grunt; When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs who bear the brunt. When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs who bear the brunt. When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who pay the price; And when the hippo parties want your vote, they’ll offer you something nice. You can pay less tax or keep your job, the choice is up to you; When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs they really screw. When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs they really screw. When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who pay the price; And when they want to be top grocer, they’ll use this strange device: “BOGOF” they say, “we’re giving it away, thought the farmers may go bust.” When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs who bite the dust. When hippos battle in the mud it’s the frogs who bite the dust. When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who pay the price; But even hippos care when polar bears run out of ice. But there’s still oil in the West, still some coal in the East; When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who count the least. When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who count the least. When hippos battle in the mud, it’s the frogs who pay the price; But if it wasn’t for the frogs, they’d lose their paradise. The food chain would be broken, the ecosystem done, And all of the hippocracy would burn up in the sun. And all of the hippocracy would burn up in the sun.
Some time in the 1990s, at a meeting of probation service managers, the then Chief Officer of Surrey Probation Service, Mike Varah, came out with a typically pithy statement about the relationship between political decision-making and what happens to ordinary people.
Over ten years later that statement, or something very like it, formed the basis of this song.